After feeling very down about a lot of things, I was almost desperate to get out of Kuching. The only way that has been possible for me has been to go with Shook to our friend's kampung. So, last Saturday, thanks to the Powers That Be!, we went off to our friend's place. We had a barbeque and generally sat around talking and laughing about the fish, the burgers and everything else. It felt good to realise that I do have a life outside of work and the associations.
For dinner, we later went to GK, which has been renamed Nice Cafe. When we asked why, the answer was funny. Apparently, everyone still refers to it as 'Nice Cafe' so the management decided to revert back to 'Nice Cafe'.
But it was while sitting there and laughing and trying to get Simon drunk that we started telling him stories about how things were before we all got shoved our separate ways. Shook and Wil kept telling Simon that they are kinder than Leon when it comes to drinking. Even then, Wil kept running after Simon with a glass of beer trying to make sure he drank it all. I tell you, anyone with a lesser sense of humour would get angry at being forced to drink when they had clearly said 'No more' already.
Then, out of the blue, Wil suddenly said he missed going out drinking with us and Mac. I found it funny considering that Mac prefers to hang out with the younger set of people nowadays. Then Wil mentioned that maybe we're too old for him. It was a remark that made me look at them all and think "Like anyone would believe we are older!"
Then we talked about drinking games. I told of the time I played an UNO drinking game and immediately Wil jumped on the idea. I thought of suggesting Munchkin but it's too serious a game for drinking sessions. But I did remind Wil of the last time we played UNO and he had to draw 12. So, if we did a shot for every Draw card we pulled, Wil would be looking at 12 shots! I think he got a bit cross-eyed just thinking about it.
Of course, we talked of all the things they did during the 'Cyberdyne days', as they called it. And Wil and Shook talked of the girls they knew. I know of these already but apparently Wil's wife did not and she kept grilling him and making jealousy-laced remarks. I wanted to ask her what she was worried about since they're already married. I was more secure in my knowledge than she was. Geez! The guy has a past. Don't hassle him about it or else the past might become the present!
And Wil, bless his soul, did what I consider the best act of friendship! He offered to go with me to Bintulu, if I ever get an attack of insecurity, just to check up on Shook. I mean, I trust Shook but there is only so much trust can do when there are bitchy snakes around. And both Wil and Simon sat there and discussed the distance and cost and length of time needed to get to Bintulu by air and by car. It was so sweet! I felt almost cherished but definitely accepted. And when I told Wil's wife that I won't be going on picnics with them without Shook around, she actually said they would come pick me up if I wanted them to. How much better can friends get, I ask you? In a world where everyone generally only thinks of themselves, there are these 4 people who are willing to go all out to make me feel better about this whole thing! I realised then why Shook enjoys spending time with this group. He caught on earlier than I did (then again, he's known Wil longer) that these are friends worth hanging onto.
Come to think of it, Wil has always helped me a lot before and I have helped him a lot too. He appreciates my honesty and doesn't hate me for it. He seems to know that I get mad at him for stupid things he did and not just for the sake of it.
But the weekend was good. It helped me reaffirm my believe in myself. I may have made some dumb choices but I made some pretty good ones too. I do have friends who care and who are secure enough to be themselves. We have too much fun to want the constant attention or the limelight. And we're too old to require that much attention.
I guess there is much to be said about hanging out with people closer to your own age. I've been spending too much time with young people or with people my own age who still haven't decided what they want and chooses to moan and groan about it. And they all want to be members of an association or all eager to get married.
Sheesh! It is enough to make people drink until they're drunk! And pass out!
10:59 am |
Category:
reflections
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4
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Comments (4)
Actually, I do want to hang out with the rest of the old gang. But no body asks me so I assume everyone's busy.
Anyway, our circumstances are very different now so it's kind of hard to hang out like we used to. Especially my work with its night shifts and weird days on/off and what not. I always seem to be free when everyone else isn't and vice versa and it's very annoying.
Like I was saying the other night, I'll be free on weekends until the end of July.
So feel free to call me up. I'm not really doing all that much these days anyway.
By the way, I'm back at work on the Monday 30th so I probably won't be able to join u guys on Labour Day itself. I'm free that weekend though.
I guess there is much to be said about hanging out with people closer to your own age.
You're very right. I like hanging out with anyone I consider a friend, but of our current group of friends I most enjoy hanging out with Iain and Nick. I can really be myself around those two - warts, insecurities and all. It's hard to explain why exactly, but the proximity in age is one major reason.
I feel the same way about hanging out with my girlfriends vs. hanging out with the guys, which is why there are times when I just hang out with the girls. It's not snobbery or exclusivity or sexism or anything like that. It's just that sometimes I just want to sit around, gossip and talk about nail-polish :)
Rin,
I know exactly what you mean. Age does make a difference when you're hanging out. The old group tend to make you feel out of place because they tend to start sentences with 'Remember the time when we...' or 'During my time, we used to...'. How much older can they sound?! And when the group's much younger, they tend to sound very naive or too carefree.
And I know the feeling of wanting to be with just girls. Girls gossip just for the fun of it. We can rant and rave just to get it out of our system. Guys cannot understand this need. Unless they're gay, of course ;)
Mac,
our outings are very last minute. We decide and move straight from there. On weekends, we tend to go to Wil's place. I'll let you know the next time we go.
Cool. I should be able to go now that I'm actually free on weekends for the time being. Just gimme a call or txt.