Last week, my boss asked me why I'm not all dizzy about my wedding. I didn't have the heart to tell her that, if I denied it long enough, I'm hoping it'll just go away.

Anyone ever wonder why I don't talk about it? It's because it scares the living daylights out of me. And I rather not talk any more than I have to about it because I'm hoping I could go to sleep on the 8th and wake up on the 12th of November.

When I get angry with Shook now, I can walk away. Where do I run to when I get angry with him after July next year?

A part of me still doesn't want to be married and I don't understand why some people are desperate to be married. I don't even understand the need to be with someone. I was fine on my own for the years before Shook came along. And since it took him one year to convince me, I figure I was still fighting it even then.

If anyone really believes I'm giddy about this wedding or being married, they are seriously deluded and need to go to Normah and check out the psych ward.